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This is Why I Believe SCOTUS Should Approve Gay Marriage

Monday, June 22nd, 2015


marriage equalityOver the recent years, I believed two people of the same sex should be able to legally marry, but I personally didn’t know how to defend the right to marry.


This week I finally worked it out in my mind and now believe whole-heartedly that marriage for gay people should be legal and it is discriminatory to not make this happen.


We’ve heard more times than we can count from religious people that marriage is traditionally and biblically should only occur when it’s between one man and one woman. Therefore they want to keep the laws to only allow for marriage benefits and advantages here in the United States when it fits that criteria.


As I look at what I see in history, and of course in the Bible, the obvious examples of marriage situations that are NOT one man and one women and include people God says are after His heart. But there are other things that stand out to me as being more common to a marriage historically that I believe are significant.


I see two people who make a decision to establish a relationship that is different than friendship, or companionship. They decide to live as one, a family with a common investment in the relationship and its life and future.


The relationship is based on love, care and nurture. In some marriages, there is the inclusion of children both natural and/or adopted. Based on the depth of connection and emotional investment, when desired or needed, the relationship is submitted to further knowledge and counsel for improvement or repair to maintain it.


There are often financial commitments and investments. Decisions are made together for home and family. Consideration is given for household investments and maintenance. A weaving of life and belonging that is significant and indicative of a marriage.


Extended family is included such as siblings and parents. There is a shared concern for their lives and wellbeing. In many cases, holidays and a shared history of tradition is built. There is an expectation for future years together. Weddings, birthdays, and funerals are also shared events with a deeper emotional connection each time they occur.


In most marriages, there is a decision to cohabit, to spend each day together in some significant way. A physical closeness is experienced for emotional support, comfort, encouragement, and sexual intimacy. Spending the energy to keep up with life events on a daily basis because each wants the other to know that someone cares and is a significant part of the other’s life. A deep knowing of the other, a looking in the eyes; sharing humor, grief, and daily life emotions is significant in a healthy marriage.


Spiritual bonds form through faith, religious convictions and practice. Stimulating one another to further growth in their faith journey is also significant for those who share a desire to do so.


When two people share a life together in this type of marriage the US government has offered a license allowing for legal benefits available for those who are married. In many states, when a couple has been living together like this for seven years, it’s called a common law marriage, recognized as legal. Some corporations and employers also offer common benefits such as medical insurance for couples that are married in this manner.


While many utilize clergy to facilitate the commitment, many others do not, taking advantage of a licensed person or government official for the vows. Marriage in the US is not always viewed as a God centered event, therefore the freedom of religion allows for this to be the case.


Some who oppose marriage for anyone other than an opposite sex couple, minimize the reality of this kind of marriage for couples who are of the same sex. They lack the clarity of thought and reason that can see that gender has nothing to do with real marriage. Two people, regardless of their gender, can emulate marriage as it has always been respected throughout history.


There are religions that do not approve of same sex marriage. That is their freedom and right to live within their own religious convictions. A religious pastor or leader who by conviction will not marry two people of the same sex are free to maintain their restrictions. In no way does another view of marriage nullify their belief. In the same way, our US government has seen fit to devise a system where one religion cannot be a guiding factor for our country. Our country has been built upon religious freedom and diversity.


Therefore, it is my conviction and belief that if two people decide to weave their lives together in a legal marriage, as described above, regardless of their gender, they should be given the right to the benefits and advantages afforded all married couples in this country. Their relationship should be legally recognized as set apart from friendship, or a business partnership.


All we have to do is to look around and see there are thousands of same-sex couples that are already married in spirit, but at this time are not allowed the benefits of opposite sex couples.


It is my hope that the Supreme Court of the Unites States will approve the order allowing same sex couples to marry and to see that any other decision would be to discriminate against same sex couples.